Mandisa made me cry this morning. I wish I could thank her.

He is with you in the ICU

When the doctors don’t know what to do

And it scares you to the core

He is with you.

I put on some music and started painting. I wanted to deal with my feelings or nonfeelings even a little bit. And it helped.

As much as it made my eyes ache even more, crying again helped too.

But really, the painting and the music.

I need to give my dog more credit. I joke that she’s not a good emotional support dog because she only wants to be near me if I have rump scratches or treats for her (which is true).

The truth is, she may not be cuddling with me or leaning against me or even really within arms’ length of me. But she’s still here. She keeps me in sight. She doesn’t bug me to talk about it.

She’s a good dog. And I’m grateful to have her here with me.